HOME the journey

The sea was rough, with whitecaps and large gaps of blue underneath each crest resisting my strokes to propel eastward towards the infamous cave entrance of Kalalau. How did I, at the time a non -strong swimmer find myself in the somewhat precarious situation of either continuing to fight through strong wind and water or retreat back to the arches of Honopu and jamming up the rest of the group’s plans for who knows how long? Memorial-day weekend 1976 commercialization of Kauai’s Na Pali coastline was not yet underway which meant would be stuck at least one more day at Honopu before making another attempt to get to where could hike out the Kalalau trail.

Presidents day 1975, drove my GT Vega to the Oakland docks early to allow enough time to get to the airport for flight to what hoped would be home for at least a while, Honolulu. Being a holiday though the guard at the cage informed that could not get the car loaded up till the following day which meant had to go find a motel again for another night plus change the flight. A week later after retrieving the GT from Honolulu’s Pier #34 was about a half mile from brother’s Makiki Magazine street walk up apartment when she sputtered out of gas. Sort of like how my stay was going as was having a heck of a time finding any type of work. “Whatever you do David don’t take no job as a security guard” was sister Diana’s advice. The want ads of course were always full of jobs for such as they were hard to fill, probably due to thousands of other people telling their recently transpotted relatives/friends the same thing.

Many of the want ads called for “local” people to apply. Diana explained that local was what I was not. After two weeks did land a job as a liberty house stock boy for its’ annual “zooper” or maybe it was “safari” sale-forget which. No matter, after being turned down to sell vacuum cleaners was thrilled just to get something going. At the end of the two weeks foreman Rodney hired me on permanent. Had Sunday and Tuesday off which gave enough time to thoroughly scour the weekend help wanted ads and plot which employers to hit up on Tuesdays. Figured it could take a while to find a job that paid more than $2.30 a hour and that was more akin to what wanted to do.

                     Illustration #1 Sister Diana   

I gasped for breath. Started off with the crawl but after swallowing more salt than air switched to the side, back and whatever else strokes could manage to stay afloat. Main difficulty was trying to relax. Had never swam in deep blue in difficult conditions before. Moments earlier our leader, living legend Lorin Gill, explained as we stood on the sand that the swim from our beach over to Kalalau’s was going to be much more difficult than planned. “The only one of you am concerned about though is Dave.” He was right to be worried. I was the one without fins, fairly new to the islands, and thanks to taking part in a recent pharmaceutical test had a two-tone body. My chest was pasty white and backside darkly tanned so looked like all that ever did by water was lie on my stomach. Got a $100 for testing the drug which paid for the local Sierra Club adventure to Honopu and Kalalau. Gaylord Wilcox had picked us up at Kauai’s international with his truck a few days earlier. After a stop at the plantation we hit the wet caves one of which involved swimming underwater to an opening and camped at the end of the road. The next day rode on his fishing boat down the coast accompanied by spinner dolphins.

The application to take part in the outing stressed that must be able to swim at least 50 yards in open seas. The main reason for that was so as to enable to get to the beach at Honopu. Gaylord’s boat docked a little less than that distance and we had no difficulty pushing our wrapped backpacks to shore. The original plan was that two days later we would walk at low tide over towards the Kalalau caves which at most would call for a swim of 20 meters. The beach at Honopu has a long stretch of sand divided by an arch large enough to fly a plane through.

Illustration #2 The arch at Honopu

It is a gorgeous piece of earth with waterfall and stream to boot. We walked out to where the arch juts out to sea and climbed up over to the top. The route was a little tricky in spots and ropes were used as a precaution. George strained his ankle on the way down. My feet were stronger in those days and went up barefoot. New found friend Wes and I discovered some large size looking bones near the summit and left them alone. From the top of the Arch you can see forever and imagine a future.

Illuaration #3 On top the arch

A half year of professional job rejections had left a taste of uncertainty. Perhaps unloading containers and pushing clothing racks to the buyers on the 3^rd floor was the best could hope for. It was deflating to sit in interviews when asked questions such as “You know what a moke is and if so how you gonna interact with such?” Or “you lived in Iowa, Colorado, Wisconsin, Louisiana, Missouri, what does that tell us about you.” Thanks to local police advising me to move on from a west side beach I knew what a moke was so those types of questions no problem. But the implied lack of stability by referencing past jobs and education was a sure sign you not getting get this job. I was 25, with a B.S., a M.A., plus sandwiched inbetween an honorable discharge as a state side stationed draftee veteran so had what thought were good answers for why had lived in different locales. But such did not matter. Determined that needed to make the best of what could out of current employment. Worked my way up to $2.80 an hour and made friends with the guys. Thanks to leader Dennis we would hit his girlfriend’s Korean bar on Friday evenings. She made sure we got plenty of ono pupus and her waitresses knew to leave us alone as we had no money.

The morning of our planned walk over to Kalalau we woke up to the fact that had two casualties. Bill had come down with severe stomach cramps via food poisoning from his homemade cheese cake the night before and George’s twisted ankle was now severely sprained. 1976 was before the age of zodiacs and frequent choppers along the Na Pali coast. If Sat phones were around back then made no diff to us as we had none. The gang gathered buku rocks and spelled out a huge HELP in the sand. It was afternoon before a military chopper spotted us. Not long after the heli came back and lowered a basket and then a rope to hoist up our injured compadres. By then the sea had gotten rough and the tide was up. There was no way to walk to Kalalau and Lorin said there was a high probability we would have to go around the cave entrance to the other side.

                                           Illustration #4 Kalalau's cave

 If so that would double the swim. That turned out to be the case. The waves were big so we went a good distance out from shore, and rode the sea in to the beach. Took the longest 45 minutes of my life to land at Kalalau. Luckily Audrey Sutherland had arrived at Honopu the night before with her inflatable kayak. She transported our packs and was good to know that if started to drown perhaps she could get to me in time.  Upon reaching the shore our group applauded me as they were happy to not have lost a third member.

                                                 Illustration #5 Kalalau landing

After 8 months of job search and no professional prospects on the horizon, Thai friend Chaiyutha Lertpachin arranged for a position teaching English at his Bangkok university. The Dean agreed to hire and was getting ready to buy a ticket when job offers in my field of rehabilitation counseling came through. Took a day to think about it then accepted the job. It was holiday season 1975. Brother John and Diana were also happy as meant that I could finally earn enough to move out on my own. I was glad too. John used to place a bean bag next to my sleeping bag to shield the light when he got up early to work at the kitchen table. So now there was hope could sleep past 4 am. The job was a perfect fit as sup allowed caseload to be built from scratch via Oahu`s alcohol and drug treatment facilities. Got to wear sandals and not get haircuts while hanging out with referrals. Was near the end of job probation period when made the trek to Kauai.

Upon reaching Kalalau’s famed beach I found some rocks to sit on and catch some breath. Not long after two twenty something attractive ladies came by to chat. “We saw you land on the beach. Where did you come from, and how did you get here?” After some chit chat the two school teachers from Ohio left as they had approached- completely naked. That evening Lorin shared some more legends of Hawai`i, Honopu, and Na Pali. His stories evoking as usual beautiful magical images. Gazing northward out to sea it was easy to visualize nothing but Alaska between us and heaven.

“Where did I come from and how did I get here?” Those questions were more complicated than had originally thought and were on my mind as bedded down on the soft fine sand.  What I did know for certain though was that the next day would be hiking out the stupendous Kalalau trail and returning to the deeply fluted Koolau mountain range above Kahaluu on the windward side of O`ahu.

                                          Illustration #6 Windward O`ahu

 I knew was gonna stay. No need to hunt for heaven when it's your home.

                        Illustration #7 10/01/1978 Brother John with Jeremiah, Betty, Diana

Home expanded

August 9th, 1974 Richard Milhous Nixon, the 37th president of the United States resigned. I along with millions of other people across the nation was attending a celebratory gathering at which all cheered as he made his announcement. It was such a relief that he finally left. In 1972, one could tell there were storm clouds coming prior to his reelection. I advised my parents to not vote red that year but am fairly certain they did so anyway. Life- long habits of party affiliation are difficult to change. A week into Gerald Ford’s presidency I was in Hawai`i taking a break before the final term visiting brother John and Diana. They were newly married and living in the Magazine street walk up. It was a wonderful two- week respite. Beach every day, a little hiking, local bar pupus, kicking back to C&K at the shell. The only downer was when Ford pardoned Nixon, Brother John went a little ballistic. Vietnam vet that he was, he believed strongly that RM needed to pay for his crimes. The pardon no bothered me, was just enjoying being laidback, and figuring out how soon could return.

Late November with internship at Fort Logan winding down, and plans getting finalized to make the move, my Dad upon having chest pains did not make it to the hospital in time and passed away. His death was a shock to all, especially our Mom. The university decided that I had enough credit and subsequently mailed the diploma home, so I had no need to go back to Colorado. Both older brothers and spouses returned for the service. Due to work considerations and obligations they could not stay more than a few days, but I could so I did. Migration to the Pacific was put on hold.

The first few weeks were difficult ones. Mom cried uncontrollably daily. She was 61, and she had always loved her husband deeply. We comforted each other. My Dad was such a good man. He lived his great love for people, and family. He is in my dreams still but was especially so those first few weeks after his passing. I so looked forward to those visits while sleeping, but not the sadness that returned upon waking. After a month or so things got better. Mom did not break down as often at home, and of course her composure around others remained rock solid. Early February she told me that I should get on with my plans to move to the islands. By then she had a home bought on the same street as my brother Paul in Missouri, which was also close to her siblings. So, I headed out on the drive from Iowa to the bay from where would ship the car. On the way stopped off in Missouri to say goodbye to Paul and Leilani. I told them that if they lived in Hawai`i, and John was in Missouri would be going to live with them too. On hindsight that was not true though.

On April 29th 1975, I watched along with John and Diana as Marines pushed a helicopter off the United States Saigon embassy roof. No celebration among us. By that time was settled into the job at Liberty House and busy looking for some sort of work related to degrees. The shine of the islands was not quite as bright as when was a visitor but it still shone. I relished the time spent with my brother and his wife. He was the oldest and when was a kid he seemed to be the brightest, most athletic, gifted person ever. He taught me stuff and protected me from bullies. By the time I was 12 he was out having marvelous adventures around the world. I lived vicariously then.

Figure 7 brother John

I loved Diana too. John brought her back to Iowa Christmas 1973 to meet the family.

Figure 8 1973

We became fast friends. She had never been in snow before and we had lots of good fun sledding, snowball fighting, and so on. Mom and Dad adored her. A few months later they went to their Honolulu wedding where Dad helped officiate. Her family took good care of them. Upon return to their small town in Iowa, Mom gave community talks that featured slides of Hawaiian flora, and some notoriety for having traveled so far.

John and Diana provided shelter, companionship and much needed emotional comfort my first several months as a Hawaii resident, especially Diana. She had lost her Mom while yet a teenager and knew I was a little lost. A pre- employment physical questionnaire which skewed toward the depressive state scale confirmed such. With time the profound disappointment of waking up after dreams that brought Dad back to life ceased. After even more time and healing the sadness was replaced by appreciation and at times, yes, even joy.

Life moved forward. I got a job in my field with the State. Developed easy rapport with residents of alcohol and drug rehabilitation facilities. Although was never personally a habitual drug user, I easily could have been. People who were sensed my vulnerability which in turn smoothed the pathway towards bonding. Was dang good at the job. Recognized as such by facility staff, peers, and participants. When run into former individuals whom assisted even some from 40 years ago am remembered fondly. As progressed on in the career am glad to say that was able to connect with people no matter what the assignment. I became part of the disability community.

At the time of the swim from Honopu to Kalalau I had been in the islands for 15 months, and was almost 6 months into counseling position. Had moved out on my own and was living in a rented banana farm Quonset hut up against the Koolau mountain range in Kahaluu. Had some good friends that hung out with on weekends. Life was good but was still not completely set on staying in Hawai`i permanently. After that trip, though was sold on making my life here. I stopped thinking about returning to the mainland or elsewhere to live.

The Hawaiian archipelago is among the most isolated group of islands in the world. 2250 miles from the nearest continental land mass translated to no human habitation until around 2000 years ago, and no western contact until the late 1700’s. Due to the presence of no terrestrial mammals’ other than the Hawaiian hoary bat, plant life developed without thorns or other defenses. Positioned just north of the equator with frequent northeast trade winds blowing 10 to 20 miles per hour meant the closest to perfect year-round weather to be found anywhere. The pig, and the goat and humans have made it harder to be in close contact with indigenous plants and indeed many species have disappeared. However, there is still much that can get close to with a little effort. Our home is up against the mountains. One can touch, smell, breathe their essence. Beauty abounds.

Figure 9 backyard

Everyplace has beauty though. But not every place affords the opportunity to sit on a beach on the north side of Kauai and realize there is nothing north of you for thousands of miles. I love that sense of isolation, of uniqueness. It drew me to make that decision to stay here. That and the fact my brother and sister were here. After his career ended John retired to the mainland. Diana has been passed for 15 years. Am forever grateful for the aloha they shared, which in turn led to the life have lived.

Figure 10 2017

Figure 11, Betty Lee 1980

While on a hiking trip in the Sierra last summer a friend asked, “where and what do you think you would be today if you had not left the Midwest, and met Betty?”

I could not respond to him for several minutes. My throat was choked as tears strolled down my face. I had never given much thought to what he asked and pondering a life without my wife, and children resulted in deep emotion. Judd’s question was in a way similar and in other ways different from the school teachers query on the beach at Kalalau 40 years earlier.

Thinking about Judd’s question still causes me pain to ponder a life without those have shared it with. The “who are you and where did you come from” teacher’s inquiry, however, which at the time caused some reflection, now days brings a smile. The answer has become easy.

For more pictures of Hawai`i: windwarddavehikeshome.blogspot.com
For pictures of Appalachian Trail: windwarddave.blogspot.com
The Sierra: sierrawindwarddave.blogspot.com